I just came back to campus a few days ago and I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about my first week as a first-year. Although I’m now a second-year, seeing all of the freshmen experience Oberlin for the first time makes the nerves, excitement, and anticipation of my first week at Oberlin feel like it was just yesterday. Like most people, a lot of the anxiety surrounding college involved friends. Would I make friends? Would I eat my first meal alone? How and where does one make friends? What if there are ‘cliques’ and I can’t find a place to fit in?
I didn’t know a single person coming into my first week at Oberlin aside from some faces I recognized from Instagram, or people I remembered from my tour the year prior. As a consequence of this, I felt both anxious and excited for the challenge and possibility of making new friends. Now, in retrospect, I can confidently say that making friends at Oberlin is not only one of the most fun experiences I have had during my time here, but also one of the easiest. That’s not to say that making friends isn’t stressful, just that at Oberlin friends are plentiful and easily made.
To answer the questions above; I made many friends at Oberlin, enjoyed my first meal with my PAL (peer advising leader group), and enjoyed ‘cliques’ only in the sense that they didn’t exist. Here are some tips I want to share with you guys on making friends, both because it is applicable to every experience you will have on-campus here at Oberlin (whether it be campus tours, All Roads Lead to Oberlin, or your first week here), but also because I think that by sharing the ways in which I made friends it will highlight the vibrant, accepting, and sociable nature that thrives on campus.
Let’s dive right in:
- Go to events. Oberlin offers a plethora of daily events, and specifically offers activities geared towards making friends during the first few weeks of the semester. One of my favorite events is Taste of Oberlin, during which local restaurants and vendors will offer samples of their culinary goods to students. After I collected a plate of Lorenzo’s pizza, 1833 Restaurant brussel sprouts, and Blue Rooster cookies, I located a familiar face from one of my classes and sat down with her. Soon a group of us formed, and we got to all chat while enjoying delicious food.
- Introduce yourself to everyone. This might sound daunting, but trust me when I tell you that it pays off. One of my friends was just telling me the other day how she introduced herself to another girl on her All Roads Lead to Oberlin tour on a whim, and they are still hanging out two years later. In my case, a moment that really stands out to me was during orientation when the entire class of 2027 met in Finney Chapel to hear the President's address. No sooner had I sat down than the girl sitting next to me extended her hand and introduced herself. Although we didn’t become friends, she is still a familiar face I wave to as I walk around campus. In short, just introduce yourself. Introduce yourself on tours, in classes, while walking around campus, while waiting in line, just wherever other people are. While not everyone will turn into a friend, everyone will turn into a familiar friendly face, and that’s just what Oberlin’s all about.
- Open your door (literally). This tip requires you to be a student at Oberlin, and preferably live in a residence hall. I highly recommend that you either leave your door physically open, or have an interactive whiteboard on your door. During move-in I left the door completely open for people to stop in and say hi (which they did!), as well as have a whiteboard up. I leave up fun questions like "What's the best library to study in?" and "Are blueberry pancakes or blueberry waffles better?" I always get fun responses that make me feel a sense of community in my residential hall. Even if you just leave your phone number and name on a whiteboard you might be surprised and find a text waiting for you the next day. All in all, when you make your move-in list I highly recommend adding a whiteboard and doorstop to your list.
Of course, there are many other ways to make friends at Oberlin, but these are my three favorite ways. I came into Oberlin knowing absolutely nobody, but now I currently have, and am actively making, more friends. So to conclude, I completely understand the stress of wondering about friends as you think about where you will go to college, and what will happen once you’re at college. It’s my hope that after reading this blog you can successfully turn that worry into excitement. At Oberlin making and finding friends is, with a little bit of effort on your part, very easy. Take it from someone who a year ago didn’t know anyone, but is now writing this blog in a lounge surrounded by very close friends.
